Ep. 291 - Your Why for Pickleball

I'm welcome to Pickable Therapy, the podcast dedicated to your pickable improvement.

This week I am on site, on location, so the sound will be a little bit different.

I am at the US Open, the 10th year of the US Open, 2026.

The US Open is a special event for me personally, as a pickable player.

I played in the US Open in its first year in 2016 and it was really set to host for me.

So in this podcast I'm going to talk to you about the Y of Pickable.

And specifically your Y of Pickable, but I was reminded of that because of this event

the US Open and I'm playing it tomorrow.

There'll be a little bit of noise in the background from time to time.

You should not interfere with the podcast, but just so you understand what's happening

if you're listening to an audio only.

Video you'll be able to see the beautiful courts behind me here in Naples, Florida.

This is one of the mecca's of Pickable.

It was one of the first facilities in Pickable that had close to 40 courts back in the day.

Now they have, I believe, 60 courts.

They've expanded it with a championship court and everything like that.

So it's a very serious venue.

My name is Tony Rueig.

I'm the host of this weekly podcast and it's a pleasure to be with you.

Let's dive into the concept of the Y of Pickable, your Y of Pickable.

And in the riff I'll share with you a little bit more about my experience at the US Open

and your own stick around for that.

And I'll share with you specifically a story about court 10 that occurred over right in front

of me there.

It's a special court for me because it was one of the first courts that I ever competed

on in this amazing score.

Spoiler, it was not a good score for us for me and my partner Tom.

But that is not why we play Pickable, right?

So I was an amazing experience from the lens.

So let's dive into this idea of the Y of Pickable.

And as I mentioned, I was reminded of this concept because of the US Open this week.

Coming down here, came down here today, playing tomorrow my friend Jeff from Macarena.

We're going to play in the men's senior open division.

When we signed up for the event, when Jeff reached out to me and signed up for the event,

I called him and I said, Jeff, I am happy to play with you.

I've known him for a few years now.

We've all been going along really well in the court.

We've never partnered together in a tournament.

But I told him I'm happy to play with you.

As long as we're clear on what you're getting, right?

On what I can offer to the equation.

I am currently not in pop tournament shape, right?

This is not my relationship with Pickable.

It's not my Y of Pickable anymore.

It was at one point in 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019.

I used to come down here.

I would be, you know, I'll try and get ready before the tournament.

Drilling, playing with my partner, you know, working on strategy and things like that.

Now my relationship with Pickable has evolved, right?

Which I think is natural.

I've been playing for 10 years.

And it's evolved to where my relationship with Pickable on my wife with Pickable is more

as a coach now.

What this is what I love doing.

I love recording these podcasts.

I love coaching players individually and in group settings.

I love thinking of curriculum and sharing content that will help Pickable players become

stronger, stronger players and have a stronger connection with the sport.

So what does that mean in terms of my ability to protect an tournament here tomorrow?

It really, from my perspective, doesn't mean anything.

Meaning, you know, I doesn't negatively impact my ability to enjoy this experience because

of the, because I'm clear on my why I'm here.

I'm clear on my why if Pickable on why I chose to join the US Open.

And I'll tie that back in in a minute after we talk a little bit more about, that's into

your why for Pickable.

So what I want you to do is think about this for a second, right?

You know, if you're listening to this podcast, you're not a casual, you know, once in a

while Pickable player.

You're a quote unquote serious Pickable player.

You play Pickable on a regular basis and that's fantastic.

But I want you to ask yourself is this question.

The question I want you to ask is why do you play?

Why do you get up, you know, whatever time you get up, you go to the courts, why do you

fight traffic if that's your case in your, you know, that's the case in your scenario.

You know, why do you, why do you schedule your week around Pickable time?

Why is that so important to you?

And I want you to take a moment now.

I want you to think about it because it's really important for you to have your own why.

And I'll tell you this, if you're listening to this podcast and you've already heard this

kind of concept, because this is a concept that is so important that I've been able to

have had it several times in prior podcasts and also in the book.

But this podcast, I'm actually going to, I'm going to come at it a little bit different

angle because I think there's always some different way of coming at a concept that might

resonate and land differently for you.

So take a moment and give a thought to why is it that you play Pickable.

And if you have somewhere you can write it down, write it down somewhere.

If you remember it and you just put it in the back of your mind, put it in the back of

your mind.

Why do you play Pickable?

All right, if you know why you play Pickable, if you have your answer, here is what we

hear when, you know, I've asked players, thousands of players, and I mean that literally,

thousands of players, why they play Pickable, both online and in person.

And what we hear are things like exercise, social, competition, growth, camaraderie, fun,

you know, all sorts of words that we hear.

What we don't hear is, I play Pickable so that I can win a game.

I don't play Pickable, we don't hear, I play Pickable because I want to get to 11 points

before my opponent gets to 11 points, which is what all that winning is, right?

I've only heard that answer one time out of thousands of players that we've asked.

So what that tells me is that for, if not all of you listening, the vast majority of

you're listening, your relation with Pickable, the reason you play Pickable is not to win

games.

It's because of, still in the blank, whatever it was that you answered before.

Now let's dive into why this is important, right?

Why this matters, why it's important to know your why, okay?

The beautiful thing about knowing your why is that you can focus on the good, you can

notice the good.

What I've been thinking about here is we're coming into spring and things are blooming,

planning some flowers the other day in the garden outside and day after I plan it and

they're already started opening, it looked beautiful.

What happens normally, as we go about our day, we're walking around, we just don't see

those flowers.

Whether we plan it in there, you know, in a garden bed next to where we're walking, or

just a quarter-and-quote weed that has a flower on it.

Now often do we stand there for a second and notice the flower, but here's the thing,

the flower is there, whether you watch it or not, whether you receive it or not, whether

you take it in or not.

The reasons you play Pickable, right, the good that is the why that you play Pickable, it's

there.

It just needs to be noticed, right?

So knowing your why, being affirmatively engaged with your why and understanding why you're

playing Pickable, allows you to have gratitude for that moment, have gratitude for the flower

if you will, of the reason why you play Pickable.

So that when you're in that environment of playing Pickable, you don't get bogged down

in the wind launch.

You're not bogged down in the, you know, oh my god, I can't believe you lost that game.

Oh my god, whatever the thing is, you're able to, you're able to really focus on the

flower, focus on friends, exercise, social, getting out of the house, growth, whatever it

is that's your why for playing Pickable, you get to notice it more by being aware of

it than if you just kind of know it's there, but you're not really paying attention to

it, just like you may know that there's a flower outside of your house right now, again,

in a quote unquote weed or down the road a little ways, but because you're not looking for

the flower because you're not consciously aware of the flower, it's not as relevant

to what's going on in your daily existence.

Knowing the why you play Pickable, I'm being, again, more, the more attuned you are to

it, the more anchor you are to that, the better you're able to experience the joy and the

positives of Pickable, which are your why.

Now the flip side is also true, which is the, which is the negative, but before I do that,

I forgot I wanted to tell you my why's for coming to the US Open, right?

And I have several why's why I'm here.

The reason I come to these types of events like the US Open is one, I get to see fellow

senior professional players who I don't get to see on the regular, right?

We're all over the country.

I met them through tournaments, I met them through coaching, I met them through other

experiences, but you know, I'm not around them all the time.

So I know that when I get here tomorrow and already today I've seen a few here walking

around. When I come back tomorrow to play, I get here, you know, a privateer about 830

and start at 10.

I'll walk around and I'll see, you know, John and Scott and the other Scott and his

couple of Scott's, the other couple of John's.

I'll see Jeff, I'll see, I mean, there's so many players who I'm going to see here, right?

That I don't get to see on the regular.

So that's one of my why's.

I get to chat with students and players I've met throughout the years.

That's already happened today several times where I've had the great pleasure of having

someone come out to me and say, I'll play a commodity and say, you know, hi, Tony, you

know, I we worked together a couple years ago and we got to reconnect on that type of experience

or, you know, they're rolled in one of the classes that we have online.

We get to chat about it.

That's amazing for me.

I love that kind of interaction and a lot of time I spend in my office doing online work

so I don't get that kind of personal interaction.

So I get that here.

I get to play.

I know that tomorrow I'm going to play some fun pickleball against amazing competition.

I can't ask for better matches that I'm going to get here at the US Open tomorrow, right?

Hopefully I'll go deep, but even if I don't, right?

I'll play two, three or four matches hopefully where I can play against really high level

competition.

I'm going to give it my best and do the best that I can, but just having the opportunity,

right?

To experience it.

That's one of the reasons I'm here.

I get to get on the court, my friend Jeff, my one mentioned earlier, right?

He's a friend of mine.

You know, we don't, he lives in another state.

We don't see each other regularly.

I've seen him, you know, at these events where I see him.

Something I said at the beginning, but not being specific to Jeff.

I get to get on court with Jeff.

We're going to go out there.

We're going to have a good time.

We're going to support each other and compete as best as we can.

And then I get to enjoy the excitement and energy that comes from an event like this.

If you ever get a chance to come to an event like the US Open or Nationals or a big PPA

event, something like that, highly recommend that you do the energies unlike anything else

in our sport.

So that's something that I get to do as well.

So these are my wise.

So you can hopefully understand now how tomorrow the results don't matter.

Now that's not the say I'm not going to try.

That's not the say I'm not going to go out there.

I'm going to hit every shot the best way I know how to do it.

I'm going to execute everything as best I can.

And I'm going to hope that that is enough to have some success.

But if it's not as it will be for the majority of the teams tomorrow, whether in my division

or other divisions, I'm still going to be great day tomorrow.

Because I'm clear on my why and I'm anchored to it.

I know what my why is.

And I've already gotten it today and I'll continue to get it tomorrow.

So that's the positive of why matters.

Let's talk about why the negative matters, right?

So the way I think about that is this, right?

I'm going to acknowledge to you, and I think it's obvious that winning feels better than

losing.

Okay, that's natural, right?

I'm doing things.

So when we win a game, we're going to feel better than when we lose a game.

Period full stop.

Now, there are also other things about my day that I would prefer to be one way than the

other way.

For example, I would prefer to be no traffic when I'm heading to the pickable courts as opposed

to some or a lot of traffic.

I actually prefer this weather right now behind me, which is a nice day, but it's a little

bit cloudy, a little bit overcast, right?

Not the right sunlight.

But if it's sunny, I can deal with it.

I can deal with that too.

Winning and losing?

Think about it the same way.

Think about it just like a characteristic of the event.

So in other words, if you prefer, let's say like me, you prefer a little bit of overcast,

right?

So my day is going to be better with a little bit overcast like it is right now.

Then my day is going to be a little bit better if I win rather than lose.

But if the overcast ends and the sun comes out of the clouds, my day is not ruined.

My day is not, oh my god, this is terrible.

What kind of a day is this?

This is all the same thing.

Traffic going to the court?

Part of life.

It's not a big deal.

Losing pig-bowl games?

Same thing, right?

Give it the same kind of weight that you do to a condition such as cloudy overcast traffic,

no traffic or other things like that that you prefer be one way, but it's another way.

Because that is the level of importance that you should give to the difference between

winning and losing a pig-bowl game.

As long as you understand your why.

And then, you know, what I recommend you do, and I recommend this in the article that

I wrote, is you know, think this through a little bit, right?

You have to end this podcast.

I'm going to give you the riff now on court 10 and give you a little bit of story.

And my background is a pig-bowl player and some of my experiences.

Also, I think it's interesting to talk about court 10.

My court 10 experience, because it gives this idea of like a food chain in pig-bowl where

like sometimes you're the hunted and sometimes you're the hunter.

Same thing happens in happened to us on the court 10 match.

So I'll explain that in a second.

But take a few minutes when we're done with this podcast.

Think about why you played pig-bowl.

Hopefully you already did that earlier, but if you didn't, think about that a little bit,

right?

And then think about, you know, could you do more to remind yourself of the good when you

play, right?

Seeing the flower, right?

Seeing the why and that your why was there, your friends, the exercise, all of those

things.

And then number three is, you know, is losing and winning, frankly, having an outsize

importance to you when you're out in the pig-bowl court, right?

Or are you able to dial it back to where it's a weather condition or something else that

is not central to the experience of your playing pig-bowl because that central piece is that

why that we keep on talking about.

And then a little extra tip here, if you, if you, if it's helpful to you, write down

your why on a little piece of tape and put it on the edge of your paddle, right?

Down by your, by your grip.

So when you're playing, you can look down, see your word and remind yourself of the flower,

the reason why you got to play pig-bowl.

So hopefully that will help you with better framing for yourself, better perspective when

you're playing.

All right, let me give you the riff now on what happened with, this is 2016 now, me and

my friend Tom, we basically just started playing pig-bowl, we met playing pig-bowl, we were

both new to the sport, athletic, you know, I came from tennis, Tom came from a high level

of golf, and so we both could, you know, navigate athleticism pretty well.

And, you know, but we just started playing pig-bowl, and April 2016 rolls around and we,

we saw the US Open being announced, we said, hey, let's, let's go down there and play.

Tom is, I like Tom's approach here, Tom basically said, hey, let's, let's just play in the open,

and it was a real open meaning, you played one match on a Friday, and they would pair up

like unknowns with knowns.

And if you won that match, you played in the open division, if you, if you lost that match,

they would bump you down to five point out.

So Tom and I get here and we go out to, we get called out to court 10 for a match, that

Friday match, the, the play in match, and we're playing against West Davidson and Dan

Moore.

If you've been playing pig-bowl for a while, you know those names, if you haven't, I

will tell you that back in the day, back in 2016, West and Dan would have been one of

the top three, five maybe, but I would say top three teams in the open that year.

You know, you had Kyle Yeach, you had a couple other players like that, but, you know, Dan

and West would have been in the mix there at the top of the conversation.

So perhaps needless to say, you know, we did not advance to the open division, we lost

that match, I think the score was like one in three or something like that.

So it was a pretty good, pretty good dropping that they put on us, and well deserved dropping

them, and they played great.

They were gentleman about it, they were very friendly about the old experience, but as

should have been, you know, we got beat.

But here's the reality right about food chain.

Like West and Dan at their height, if they were going to play at their height again, not

today and age and so on, but at their peak, if they were to play then John's to Gabe

Tardier, the number one team today, I don't know that they would score one in three.

Not sure.

I don't think they would.

I think it would be like, you know, that might be three in three, four in three, something

like that.

The reason I say this is not to talk down Dan and West, they're amazing athletes.

The reason I mentioned this is because all of us have this experience, same thing, which

is think of like the last time you played a team that you're just like, oh my god, there's

so much better than I am to just, you know, and that in that case, you are the what?

You're the hunted and they're the hunter, right?

You're the prey and they're the hunting party.

I guarantee you that there are other teams that feel the same way about you, right?

They're players who feel the same way about you.

And there's just kind of like a food chain.

It's just natural, right?

Where you have players, you know, at Tom and I at the time, we were decent players.

We're much better players today.

But even today, we're not beating Dan and West.

You know, we're more competitive.

Maybe it's like six and seven.

Maybe we take a game.

I'm not sure.

Very difficult for us to beat them, you know, on the regular, you know, one out of 50,

maybe some of that will be, will beat them in a match.

But even though we're good players, there's still players who are better than us.

And the players are not as good as us, right?

So getting bogged down with this idea of, you know, like this team is so good and I'm

not, you know, and base and thinking about yourself as a player, only relative to players

who are better than you and therefore make you feel lacking.

It really doesn't make sense when you have a bigger perspective, which is this idea of

like the food chain of having understanding that they're, yes, there are going to be players

who are better than you and those are going to be players who are not as good at you.

And frankly, unless your name, your, a man in your name is Ben John's or your woman

name is Anneli Waters, there's always going to be a player better than you because those

who are the best players on the planet.

So even the other players who are really, really good, somebody better than Ben.

So hopefully it helps you keep some perspective in terms of that, that food chain idea.

And I just want to show you guys a little bit of story background there about what happened

in the 2016.

Thank you.

2016, US Open there at Core 10.

So that's this week's podcast.

I hope you enjoyed it.

Next week back in the studio, regular sound, regular podcast, more boring background though,

even though it's a nice, we have that nice little wall of little things on the wall.

But tomorrow, wish me luck.

Well, I'll be done by the time this Friday podcast stops.

But know that when you hear this podcast, I will have had a good time, no matter the results

of my tournament tomorrow.

And as always, if you have a moment, please consider rating and we're doing the podcast

that helps others reach it and share it with your friends.

If you have a big of a friend who's dealing with this feeling of not being sufficient

because either the food chain or because they're losing more than they expect that they

should.

I'll be having a great week and I'll see you next time on the next episode.

I'll take a break.

See you.